Here is the side of the phone conversation you would have heard if you were sitting next to me during this phone call to a customer.

Tech Support: "Ok, if you want to access the program you just installed you need to first go to the start menu...the start menu.... Ok, you get to that by moving your pointer, with the mouse, to the start button...the start button.... You are using Windows 98, correct? Ok, the start button?...in the lower left hand corner of the screen?...the START button...the button that says 'start'... lower left hand corner...start...yes, it looks like a button...says 'start', that's right...start.... Now move your pointer to that button.... No leave the mouse on the table and just slide it.... See how the pointer moves on the screen...? Yes, very neat. Move it over to the start button.... Yes, the button we were just discussing.... Press the button.... What...? Oh...ok, now what I want you to do is push the power button again to turn the computer back on...."

haha it's amazing how computer illiterate some people are.. its like trying to tell someone to drive around the block without turning on the engine... lol

LMAO.

I can't imagine the nightmarish frustration some of you guys go through. Reading this and some of the other stories I've seen here make me wince. It may be small but the one positive light in this conversation was when she apparantly said "that's neat". Maybe if she finds that neat, then as she progresses, she will find a lot of things 'neat' on the computer and make her learning curve steep and easy. I remember early on when I lost my task bar. (in my defense, there were three of us using one computer and someone else had set autohide, a feature I didn't know about)

DL

Edited December 1, 200520 yr by DL

sound like my sister and mom, they have absolutly no clue what they are doing.

the one thing that i hate about tech support is that they always think that you are an average computer using, meaning that you are very stupid. i like to tell them if i ever need help, that i have already done this and that, but they insist on walking me through it, which never works. such as problems with when we first got dsl, and it wouldnt work sometimes so that guy was like, restart your comp, restart the router, unplug everything and plug back in, unplug all the phones in the house. i obviously know that these will not help and all and they didnt, the problem was that we were too far away from the dsl base and were getting a bad signal!

i also love the tech support guy who has no clue what he is talking about b/c i am too smart for him.

sound like my sister and mom, they have absolutly no clue what they are doing.

the one thing that i hate about tech support is that they always think that you are an average computer using, meaning that you are very stupid. i like to tell them if i ever need help, that i have already done this and that, but they insist on walking me through it, which never works. such as problems with when we first got dsl, and it wouldnt work sometimes so that guy was like, restart your comp, restart the router, unplug everything and plug back in, unplug all the phones in the house. i obviously know that these will not help and all and they didnt, the problem was that we were too far away from the dsl base and were getting a bad signal!

i also love the tech support guy who has no clue what he is talking about b/c i am too smart for him.

Tell me about it... Happens to me all the time!

well thats why i never use tech support anymore, you can always find help in a forum if you cant fix it yourself

@Railman5

Might have been Lou Costello at the other end of that line:

Costello: Hey, Abbott!

Abbot: Yea, Lou?

Costello: I just got my first computer.

Abbot: That's great Lou. Whatcha get?

Costello: A Pentium IV, with 512 Megs of RAM, a 120 Gig hard drive and a 52X CD-ROM.

Abbot: That's terrific, Lou.

Costello: But I don't know what any of it means!!

Abbot: You will in time.

Costello: That's exactly why I am here to see you.

Abbot: Oh?

Costello: I heard that you are a real computer expert.

Abbot: Well, I don't know....

Costello: Yes-sir-ee. You know your stuff. And you're going to train me.

Abbot: Really?

Costello: Uh huh. And I am here for my first lesson.

Abbot: O.K. Lou. What do want to know?

Costello: I have no trouble turning it on, but I heard that you should be very careful how you turn it off.

Abbot: That's true.

Costello: So, here I am working on my new computer and I want to turn it off. Whatta my suppos' to do?

Abbot: Well, first you press the Start button, and then-

Costello: No, I told you, I want to turn it off.

Abbot: I know, you press the Start button-

Costello: Wait a second. I want to turn it off. Off. I know how to start it. So tell me what to do.

Abbot: I did.

Costello: When?

Abbot: When I told you to press the Start button.

Costello: Why should I press the Start button?

Abbot: To shut off the computer.

Costello: I press Start to stop?

Abbot: Well, Start doesn't actually stop the computer.

Costello: I knew it! So what do I press.

Abbot: Start.

Costello: Start what?

Abbot: Start button.

Costello: Start button to do what?

Abbot: Shut down.

Costello: You don't have to get rude!

Abbot: No, no, no! That's not what I meant.

Costello: Then say what you meant.

Abbot: To shut down the computer, press-

Costello: Don't say, "Start!"

Abbot: Then what do you want me to say?

Costello: Look, if I want to turn off the computer, I am willing to press the Stop button, the End button ... even the Cease and Desist button, but no one in their right mind presses the Start to Stop.

Abbot: But that's what you gotta do.

Costello: And you probably Go at Stop signs and Stop at green lights.

Abbot: Don't be ridiculous.

Costello: I 'm being ridiculous? Well. I think it's about time we started this conversation.

Abbot: What are you talking about?

Costello: I am starting this conversation right now. Good-bye.

Lazy8

Yea......

i can almost hear those two clowns in the background.

brilliant

lmao good stuff... A shutdown shortcut to %windir%\system32\sethc.exe -s -t 00 or telling them ctrl+esc (instead of clicking start) would be helpful to these people.

They are both really funny. But you think about it you go to start to stop... Who came up with that????

sound like my sister and mom, they have absolutly no clue what they are doing.

the one thing that i hate about tech support is that they always think that you are an average computer using, meaning that you are very stupid. i like to tell them if i ever need help, that i have already done this and that, but they insist on walking me through it, which never works. such as problems with when we first got dsl, and it wouldnt work sometimes so that guy was like, restart your comp, restart the router, unplug everything and plug back in, unplug all the phones in the house. i obviously know that these will not help and all and they didnt, the problem was that we were too far away from the dsl base and were getting a bad signal!

i also love the tech support guy who has no clue what he is talking about b/c i am too smart for him.

I know what you mean. I hung up on a tech support person from TDK once (my CD-RW was on the fritz) because she got upset when I didn't explicitly wait for her instructions on how to get to the Device Manager. I'm setting there waiting on her to catch up with me and made the mistake of saying so. Her response:

CS: "Sir, you have to follow my instructions EXACTLY!" (emphasis where required)

Me: "I work on computers for a living, I know what I'm doing."

CS: "So why are you calling us then?" (literally as snidely as it sounds)

Me: "You know what, why am I calling you."

And promptly hung up on her. Stupid.....witch.

Yeah, it is easy to get frustrated, but think about it--if those on the other end of the phone were trully computer "experts", chances are they wouldn't have a job answering phone calls all day!

ROFL