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Lazy8

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  1. Nuhi removed the option to change, and yet kept a portion of the feature. This easily editable entry shows up regularly in Winnt.sif, and has been my workaround since v1.0RC8. [Unattended] CommonProgramFilesDir = "C:\Program Files\Common Files"
  2. In the high school gym, all the girls in the class were lined up against one wall, and all the boys against the opposite wall. Then, every ten seconds, they walked toward each other until they were half the previous distance apart. A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer were asked, "When will the girls and boys meet?" The mathematician said: "Never." The physicist said: "In an infinite amount of time." The engineer said: "Well... in about two minutes, they'll be close enough for all practical purposes." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ A programmer and an Engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from Los Angeles to New York. The Programmer leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Programmer persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don’t know the answer, I pay you $5." Again the Engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Programmer, now somewhat agitated, says "Ok, if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5, and if I don’t know the answer, I’ll pay you $50!" This catches the engineer’s attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The programmer asks the first question: "What is the distance from the Earth to the moon?" The engineer doesn’t say a word, but simply reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the programmer. Now, it’s the engineer’s turn. He asks the programmer, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The programmer looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his notebook computer and searches all of his references. He uses the Airphone to log online, attempts to Google the answer, and queries several research databases. Frantically, he e-mails all his contacts and crossposts to every newsgroup--to no avail. After about an hour, he wakes the engineer and hands him $50. He politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep. The programmer, more than a little miffed, shakes the engineer and asks, "Well, so what’s the answer?" Without a word, the engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the programmer $5, and turns away to get back to sleep. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- An Engineering Student, a Physics Student, and a Mathematics student were each given $150 dollars and were told to use that money to find out exactly how tall a particular hotel was. All three ran off, extremely keen on how to do this. The Physics student went out, purchased some stopwatches, a number of ball bearings, a calculator, and got some friends. He had them all time the drop of ball bearings from the roof, and he then figured out the height from the time it took for the bearings to accelerate from rest until they impacted with the sidewalk. The Math student waited until the sun was going down, then she took out her protractor, plumb line, measuring tape,and scratch pad, measured the length of the shadow, found the angle the buildings roof made from the ground, and used trignometry to figure out the height of the building. These two students bumped into the Engineering student the next day, who was nursing a really bad hangover. When asked what he did to find the height of the building he replied: "Well, I walked up to the bell hop, gave him 10 bucks, asked him how tall the hotel was, and made it to the bar in time for happy hour!"
  3. If you keep it that short, you can get away without shampoo, as well.
  4. Answered No. I've enjoyed running it without special effects, and consider anything extra to be distracting. Besides, at least one of my computers gains a bit of speed with the plain vanilla settings.
  5. Hmph...never did approve of my behavior. At long last, there's something I can do to keep my abusive attitude in check. Watch yer back, Lazy8.
  6. Both kinds...Country and Western
  7. Done, though I wasn't able to view some of the results. Thanks for your interest in MSFN forums, Chia-Hao. I hope you find some value here beyond your current project.
  8. Mine were growing straight, but too far back to clean well or fill. Had the upper two removed, so no problem with dry socket--and fortunately, no sinus flooring either. It wasn't painful, even though I had local anasthetic only. Just a bit unsettling to feel the tooth rip out of the socket--a sensation interesting enough that I was happy to skip the gas.
  9. A telephone man joined the Army. As part of his basic training, he went out on the rifle range. He fired 99 shots at the target, and missed the target with every shot! His Drill Instructor tried to find out why. "What's the matter with you?" asked the DI. "Why can't you hit the target? What were you in civilian life?" "I was a telephone man," replied the new recruit, "and I don't know why I can't hit the target. Let me see..." The telephone man looked in the chamber of his weapon. Then he checked the chamber again...and a third time. He then put his finger in front of the muzzle, pulled the trigger, and blew his fingertip off! "Well," the phone man said, writhing in pain, "the bullets leave my end just fine. The trouble must be at the other end!"
  10. Lazy8

    Dead lock

    Gridlock is an American term, too--and the sight of pedestrians walking around stuck traffic is just as comical here.
  11. Lazy8

    Amir's journal

    The fun continues on the comments page. Various people anonymously post threatening replies (ostensibly Amir, or his buddies) to harass laptopguy. He eventually couldn't keep up with the volume, so all 1000 posts were copied over and continued here: http://tofangsazan-the.blogspot.com/
  12. Lazy8

    Amir's journal

    Which guy to you mean--the object of the blog (Amir), or its real author (laptopguy)?
  13. http://www.amirtofangsazan.blogspot.com/
  14. She awakes to find that her husband is not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She peers around the door jamb, and there he is -- sitting at the dining room table with a cup of coffee in front of him. He appears deep in thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of coffee. "What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?" The husband looks up, "Do you remember when we were dating, and you were only 18?" he asks solemnly. The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, of course I do" she replies. The husband pauses. The words are not coming easily. "Do you remember when your mother caught us behind the couch making it?" "Yes, I remember," says the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continues..."Do you remember when she shoved that shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I send you to jail for 20 years?'" "I remember that too." she replies softly, stroking his arm. He wipes another tear from his cheek,... "I would have been freed today."
  15. Good thing the Admins never ask those questions to screen their applicants. Otherwise, they would have known you didn't have a prayer.


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