XPerceniol Posted February 12, 2023 Author Share Posted February 12, 2023 13 hours ago, msfntor said: But Sal... why you think you're NOT safe on your hill? It's your imagination only, I think... I'm safe in my home for the most part, people leave me alone but outside there is hate and disdain and I don't speak much anymore to people because I'm fearful I will be beaten up for just breathing the same air as them; but yeah, I know I pass judgment on others when I don't really know and thank heavens there are no Russians here. I'm one of the oldest here now, only 3 others and they don't know me and I sort of want to keep it that way as I wouldn't be a good friend to anybody in this shape. Nobody would want to be around me, but I don't want to change for others (that is stupid) only myself and to make my life pleasant. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 12, 2023 Author Share Posted February 12, 2023 Like, everyone is gone now and where, I don't know, since everyone here is broke, but I'm just glad to have it quiet on Saturday. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legacyfan Posted February 12, 2023 Share Posted February 12, 2023 4 minutes ago, XPerceniol said: I'm safe in my home for the most part, people leave me alone but outside there is hate and disdain and I don't speak much anymore to people because I'm fearful I will be beaten up for just breathing the same air as them; but yeah, I know I pass judgment on others when I don't really know and thank heavens there are no Russians here. I'm one of the oldest here now, only 3 others and they don't know me and I sort of want to keep it that way as I wouldn't be a good friend to anybody in this shape. Nobody would want to be around me, but I don't want to change for others (that is stupid) only myself and to make my life pleasant. do you feel safe around me? (just asking) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 12, 2023 Author Share Posted February 12, 2023 Yes, you're a nice guy. Mainly its in public in which I rarely partake. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 14, 2023 Author Share Posted February 14, 2023 Ok. so... I need to back to it again and I've lots bottled up inside and need to write and this is the thread for me to do so. Everyone here was so worked up (where I reside, not the forums) about politics and I insisted we turn off the news and things are calm now and I'm sitting here with my back turned to the TV and Bones is playing and I'm enjoying it. I'm drinking a sun burst melon lemonade. I don't fit in anywhere in this world or on the net and mental health forums are no longer my liking. I forgot my blog and never actually started it. I want to talk more about acquired brain injury and my mental health but I'm just stuck in this rut and cant see any way out and I don't see light at the end of the tunnel. Sleep has been everything but restorative. Ugh... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legacyfan Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 I'm always here to help if needed 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 14, 2023 Author Share Posted February 14, 2023 My therapist is useless, while a nice person, nothing she says resonates with me. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 14, 2023 Author Share Posted February 14, 2023 Just now, legacyfan said: I'm always here to help if needed Thank you so much @legacyfan I may take you up on that offer if that is alright. How do you stay to balanced? If ok to ask you such. Do you meditate? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 14, 2023 Author Share Posted February 14, 2023 (edited) For the foreseeable future I'll likely stay glued to this thread and only stray on occasion. Sort of taking this news hard and I've lost family to suicide. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonathan_Brandis On November 11, 2003, Brandis was found hanged in the hallway of his Los Angeles apartment. He was transported to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center[10] and died the following day of injuries sustained from the hanging. He was 27 years old.[11] Brandis did not leave a suicide note.[12] After his death, friends reported that he had been depressed about his waning career and was reportedly disappointed when his appearance in the 2002 war drama Hart's War, a role he hoped would revive his career, was significantly reduced in the film's final cut. Brandis began drinking heavily and said that he intended to kill himself.[13] Edited February 14, 2023 by XPerceniol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 14, 2023 Author Share Posted February 14, 2023 8 minutes ago, legacyfan said: I'm always here to help if needed Please don't feel as if you need to rescue me though, I don't want to bring your mood down or make you feel bad. Okay? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
msfntor Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 (edited) 10 hours ago, XPerceniol said: For the foreseeable future I'll likely stay glued to this thread and only stray on occasion. But don't forget my Detox thread, please, Page 50 already (to click on Pretty Detox Posts link): Thank you! Edited February 14, 2023 by msfntor 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
msfntor Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 19 hours ago, XPerceniol said: Do you meditate? Be TRUE, Sal... You should stop with this "meditation" crap...you are an intelligent person, so you know it does NOTHING but waste or "fill" your time. It's actually wasted time, and you must know that, right, Sal? It's the same as thinking for a while about the chicken you ate a week ago... poor chicken, but "meditating" about it is also for nothing, so little effect, isn't it? Am I right? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
msfntor Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 I'd like to see you "meditate" about socializing more with people...maybe know a good soul (of the opposite sex of course) to improve your life...what do you think, Sal...? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 14, 2023 Author Share Posted February 14, 2023 2 hours ago, msfntor said: Be TRUE, Sal... You should stop with this "meditation" crap...you are an intelligent person, so you know it does NOTHING but waste or "fill" your time. It's actually wasted time, and you must know that, right, Sal? It's the same as thinking for a while about the chicken you ate a week ago... poor chicken, but "meditating" about it is also for nothing, so little effect, isn't it? Am I right? I know you mean well, but meditation has been a life-saver for me better than medication, so I don't agree. Can we agree to disagree? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XPerceniol Posted February 15, 2023 Author Share Posted February 15, 2023 2 hours ago, msfntor said: what do you think, Sal...? I LOVE me just the way I am! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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