Someone sent me this as a text file a few months ago: --------------------------------------------------------------- How can you tell if your child is a hacker? - he never sleeps - the FCC is always at the door - he has 5 cell phones - he always has nice s*** but it doesn't work - he speaks in some jive language - he has friends in every 3rd world country - he has no phone bill - he has seven lines but pays for none - he asks for a case of Coke for Christmas - he never lets you use your own credit cards - he doesn't talk much but types fast - he is paranoid and doesn't leave the house - he speaks its in acronyms - he comes home with garbage bags marked AT&T - he is extremely sensitive to light - he has no respect for anyone - he gets straight A's in school without attending - he has spare parts for all electronic objects - he has logs of other peoples chat - the power goes out he fixes it - he has his own radio station - he always has bad lag - he watches space shuttle launches with unusual interest for a young kid - he drives an AT&T truck - he drools at passing TELCO vans with 4 or 5 lineman's handsets - he is way to interested in the stock market - he has a car with a license plate that rotates between 6 or eight plates - he can tell mom what number she dials from across the room - he is either very obese or very skinny with thick glasses - he has manuals with 75, ROLM, Plexar, ESS5 and SWB on it - he has the neighbors phone bills, credit reports, and credit card bills - he knows who is moving in next door before they move in - he has taco bell, burger king, pizza boxes, empty bottles and full ashtrays everywhere - he has 10 pay phones in his room - he cards pizza's every night - he has 5 corpses of Bell men in his basement - he is more interested in CERTGIV and NASAGOV than girls! - he only has one shirt - he reads bar codes faster than the supermarket people - he never calls people by their full name - he can hear frequencies the dog normally hears - he says he was talking long distance with a friend but you never get the bill - he can name what city someone is in by their telephone - he detects police better than radar - he doesn't ever hit red lights - he gets 10,000 catalogs in the mail - he is always ordering 65537 MHz crystals - he has his own fleet of nuclear subs - he can memorize card numbers in a single glance - he argues about everything - he always needs more solder - he has burns from solder on his hands - he eats captain crunch cereal all day - he has more friends on IRC than in home state - he writes with all 00000001 0000010 00000101 - he refers to the president by his social security number - he got accepted into every college, after dropping out of high school - he carries boxes in his pocket to school