jerseygirl Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 DEEP THOUGHTS....... 1. Only in America......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. 2. Only in America......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink. 3. Only in America......do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front. 4. Only in America......do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke. 5. Only in America......do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters. 6. Only in America......do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage. 7. Only in America......do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place. 8. Only in America......do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. 9. Only in America......do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'. 10. Only in America......do they have drive-up ATM machines and mcdonalds drive-thrus with Braille lettering. EVER WONDER: Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?! Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prathapml Posted August 15, 2004 Share Posted August 15, 2004 ROFL....... Each one of these is a classic - fantastic collection! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadGutts Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 LOLIts not on in america though..... The UK has the same mentality !!btw... Why is the Black box called a Black box, when they are clearly bright orange !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sven Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? i think he decided that if he was saving the world, he could use something to annoy people with. and also, every time you get bitten, u think about him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SiMoNsAyS Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?i really like this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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