first, i would like to appolize for such a stupid quesiton, but i cant find it anywhere. is there anyway to stop windows update from opening when an administrator logs in?

Are you seeing the Windows Update web site pop up, the Security Center GUI for enabling Windows Update, or the system tray icon letting you know that you need to configure Automatic Updates or that updates are available?

Internet Explorer opens to the Windows Update website. I have searched everyone i can think of on my machine to stop this from happening, but i cannot find a command to open IE on login.

Go to internet options and then hit the advanced tab.

The second one under "browsing" should be "Automatically check for Internet Explorer Updates"

Uncheck that

Hit OK

Log out

Log back in

Voila!

Also, try downloading autoruns from www.sysinternals.com and you should be able to disable it (and any other application or service that starts with your PC).