hbinded

Three old men were talking about how much their hands shook. The first old guy said, “My hands shake so bad, that when I shaved his morning, I cut my face.” The second old fogey one-upped him and said, “My hands shake so bad, that when I trimmed my garden yesterday, I sliced all my flowers off.” The third old man laughed and said, “That’s nothing. My hands shake so bad that when I took a p*** yesterday, I came three times!”

Version 1.67 is out Changelog 1.66 -> 1.67 | (2007-03-06) - Updated ffdshow to revision 1004 - Updated QuickTime components to version 7.1.5.120 - Updated Haali Media Splitter to version 1.7.89.0 - Added Haali MPEG PS splitter - Minor changes Contents of version 1.67: Player: * Media Player Classic [version 6.4.9.0+ SVN build 2007-03-06] ffdshow: * ffdshow [rev. 1004] * ffdshow VFW interface * extra plugins DirectShow video filters: * XviD [version 1.1.2] * DivX [version 6.5.1.0] * On2 VP6 [version 6.4.2.0] * On2 VP7 [version 7.0.10.0] * MPEG-1 / MPEG-2 (Cyberlink) [version 6.0.0.3402] * MPEG-1 / MPEG-2 (DScaler5) [version 0.0.8.0] * MPEG-1 / MPEG-2 (Gabest) [version 1.0.0.3] * MPEG-1 / MPEG-2 (MainConcept) [version 1.0.0.78] * MPEG-1 / MPEG-2 (Ligos) [version 4.0.0.77] VFW video codecs: * XviD [version 1.1.2] * DivX Pro [version 6.5.0.53] * x264 [rev. 600] * Windows Media 9 VCM [version 9.0.1.1184] * On2 VP6 [version 6.4.2.0] [Encoding] * On2 VP7 [version 7.0.10.0] [Encoding] * Intel Indeo [version 5.2562.15.54] * Intel Indeo [version 4.51.16.2] * Intel Indeo [version 3.24.15.03] * Intel I.263 [version 2.55.1.16] * huffyuv [version 2.1.1 CCE Patch 0.2.5] * I420 (Helix) [version 1.2] * YV12 (Helix) [version 1.2] QuickTime Alternative: * QuickTime codecs [version 7.1.5.120] * QuickTime plugin for Internet Explorer * QuickTime plugin for Firefox/Mozilla/Netscape/Opera * Extra QuickTime plugins * QuickTime DirectShow parser * QuickTime DirectShow decoder wrapper Real Alternative: * RealMedia codecs [version 6.0.12.1741] * RealMedia plugin for Internet Explorer * RealMedia plugin for Firefox/Mozilla/Netscape/Opera * RealMedia DirectShow splitter [version 1.0.1.1] DirectShow audio filters: * MP3 (Fraunhofer) [version 1.9.0.311] * AC3/DTS/LPCM (AC3Filter) [version 1.11] * MP1/MP2 (MainConcept) [version 1.0.0.78] * Vorbis (CoreVorbis) [version 1.1.0.79] * AAC (CoreAAC) [version 1.2.0.575] * MusePack [version 1.0.0.3] * Monkey's Audio [version 1.00] * WavPack (CoreWavPack) [version 1.0.3] * FLAC (illiminable) [version 0.73.1936] * Voxware MetaSound [version 1.0.0.12] ACM audio codecs: * MP3 (Fraunhofer) [version 3.4.0.0] * MP3 (LAME) [version 3.97] * AC3 (ffcHandler) [version 1.3.1] * Vorbis [version 0.0.3.6] * DivX ; ) Audio [version 4.2.0.0] DirectShow source filters: * AVI splitter (Gabest) [version 1.0.0.7] * AVI splitter (Haali Media Splitter) [version 1.7.89.0] * MP4 splitter (Haali Media Splitter) [version 1.7.89.0] * MP4 splitter (Gabest) [version 1.0.0.3] * Matroska splitter (Haali Media Splitter) [version 1.7.89.0] * Matroska splitter (Gabest) [version 1.0.2.9] * Ogg splitter (Haali Media Splitter) [version 1.7.89.0] * Ogg splitter (Gabest) [version 1.0.0.0] * FLV splitter (Gabest) [version 1.0.0.1] * MPEG TS splitter (Haali Media Splitter) [version 1.7.89.0] * MPEG PS splitter (Cyberlink) [version 1.0.0.4528] * MPEG PS splitter (Gabest) [version 1.0.0.3] * MPEG PS splitter (Haali Media Splitter) [version 1.7.89.0] * MPEG PS splitter (MainConcept) [version 1.0.1.20] * MPEG PS splitter (Elecard) [version 1.0.31.51211] * MPEG PS splitter (Ligos) [version 4.0.0.77] * MP3 Source (DCoder) [version 1.3] * AC3/DTS Source (AC3File) [version 0.3a] * SHOUTcast Source [version 1.0.0.1] * AAC parser (Orban) [version 1.0.27] DirectShow subtitle filter: * DirectVobSub (a.k.a. VSFilter) [version 2.37 + fixes] * DirectVobSub (a.k.a. VSFilter) [version 2.33] DirectShow audio filters (general purpose): * Morgan Multimedia Stream Switcher [version 0.9.9] Encoding tools: * LAME CLI and DLL [version 3.97] * LameDropXPd [version 3.97] * OggDropXPd [version 1.8.9 aoTuVb5] Tools: * GSpot Codec Information Appliance [version 2.70a] * VobSubStrip [version 0.11] * GraphEdit [build 041201] * MMCompView [version 1.10] * AVI Fixed [version 2.0b1] * FourCC Changer * Bitrate Calculator Note:This was created using the profile "Lots of stuff" Download Link 1:http://files.to/get/386744/11680/KLMCODEC167.CAB Download Link 2:http://rapidshare.com/files/19793589/KLMCODEC167.CAB

Version 3.01 has already been released, but I haven't seen an addon for it Change log: v3.01 Released: February 26th, 2007 - Download This is a small update that fixes a few bugs that have been found since 3.0 was released. * Fixed: Crash when trying to save a palette with a blank name * Fixed: Changing an image's DPI resolution did not set its "dirty" flag (you would not be asked to save changes) * Fixed: Error messages at startup were covered by the splash screen * Fixed: Crash when a modal dialog was open (such as an effect) when the user tried to log off/restart/shutdown Windows, and they chose to save their images * Mitigated some CPU usage issues when the app was minimized and a complex selection was active Note:Installs to %PROGRAMFILES%\Paint.Net and adds a desktop icon for all users Download Link 1:http://files.to/get/386745/27643/PAINTDOTNET.CAB Download Link 2:http://rapidshare.com/files/19793590/PAINTDOTNET.CAB

I will use NSIS to copy the files. thanks a-lot! p.s. sorrry for the late reply.

At the end of the tax year the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a synagogue. While he was checking the books he turned to the Rabbi and said, "I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?" "Good question," noted the Rabbi. "We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles." "Oh," replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way: "What about all these matzo (a very thin brittle biscuit of unleavened bread) purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?" "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi, realizing that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. "We collect them and send them back to the manufacturers, and every now and then they send a free box of matzo balls." "I see," replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?" "Here, too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins and send them to the Tax Office, and about once a year they send us a complete d*ck."

A couple were going out for the evening. They'd gotten ready, all dolled up, dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives, and as the couple start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don't want the dog shut in the house, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out. The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver: "He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother." A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry I took so long" he says. "Stupid b***h was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her a** downstairs and tossed her in the back yard! She better not crap in the vegetable garden again either!"

Hi guys, in my endeavors to disassemble my laptop, I busted my stock dvd drive. I know you must be thinking why I still have that "old" laptop but the thing is I needed a laptop for my schoolwork. Anyways, with which drives can I replace my stock drive with (apart from the ones from hp --> too expensive! ) Thanks in advance

Hi, I have one quick question. After using nlite to make my unattended install, I noticed that the name of my %HOMEPATH% folder (which in my case is supposed to be C:\Documents and Settings\Administrator" ) had changed into "C:\Documents and Settings\Administrator.INFECTED" INFECTED is the name of my computer. I had some folders and files in "$OEM$\$Docs\Administrator\My Documents\Projects" which were supposed to be copied over during install but they weren't. So I was wondering what could have caused this? and how can I avoid the renaming of the said folder? Thanks!

Hey, this bring up ICQ at T-13 stage of windows. could you check on that? thanks. As for me, I just used taskkill

A Farmer and his sheep A farmer buys several sheeps, hoping to breed them. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheeps are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help.The vet tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn`t have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, he only asks the vet how he will know when the sheeps are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will, instead, lay down and wallow in the mud when they are pregnant. The farmer hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means HE has to impregnate the sheeps. So he loads the sheeps into his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all. Then he brings them back and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheeps. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes that the first try didn`t take, and loads them in the truck again. He drives them out to the woods, does each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes to find the sheeps still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself,and proceeds to load them up and drives them out to the woods. He spends all day with the sheeps and, upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look at the sheeps. He asks his wife to look out and tell him if the sheeps are laying in the mud. "No," she says, "they`re all in the truck and one of them is honking the horn." ############################################################################################# Moral Lesson There once was a nonconformist bird that decided not to fly south for the winter. He said "I've had enough of this flying south every winter, I'll just stay right here on this farm, what's the big deal, anyway?" So he stayed. Winter came and was very cold, the nonconformist bird had never felt such cold weather and was afraid that he might freeze to death. Realizing he had made a big mistake by staying, he headed to a near by barn for shelter. On his way to the barn it began to snow. The poor bird was cold, tired and hungry. "Why did I stay?" he asked himself as he collapsed on the ground. As he lay there covered by the snow, a cow happened by. The cow, feeling the need to relieve himself, crapped right on the bird. At first being angry the bird said, "Who did this horrible thing to me, how dare someone crap on me, I'll get him for this!" The crap was too heavy for him to free himself. But, after a while the crap began to warm him and he forgot all about his anger. In fact he was so warm that he began to sing. A buzzard passing overheard the singing and went down to investigate. As he cleared away the crap to his delight he found the bird. The bird was so happy to be free from the crap that he thanked the buzzard, who then decided to eat the little bird. The moral of this story: Just because someone craps on you, it does not make them your enemy, and just because someone gets you out of the crap, it does not make them your friend. ############################################################################################# A Hooker with AIDS A young boy goes to a whorehouse with a crushed tortoise in his hand and says "I want a hooker with aids!" "Sir, you can't be serious. We do our outmost to AVOID having hookers like that here. They go through regular medical check-ups. Really!" But the boy insists, and in the end they find him a hooker with aids. When he's done, and about to leave, the clerk has to ask... "Why in the world are you so happy now? You have aids!" "Well", he replies "When I come home, I'm gonna f*** the maid. So she'll have aids, right?" "Right" "Then she'll f*** my dad, and he'll have aids, right?" "Right..." "Then he'll f*** my mom, and she'll have aids, right?" "Right..." "Then she'll f*** the gardener and then he will have aids! Haha!" "And why do you want your gardener to have aids...?" "Because that son of a b***h stepped on my tortoise!" #############################################################################################

Corporate Lesson 1 A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side of the road, he stopped and offered her a lift, which she accepted. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open and reveal a lovely leg. The priest had a look and nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun looked at him and immediately said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" The priest was flustered and apologized profusely. He forced himself to remove his hand. Changing gear, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" Once again the priest apologized "Sorry sister but the flesh is weak." Arriving at the convent, the nun got out gave him a meaningful glance and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to retrieve a bible and looked up Psalm 129. It Said, "Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory." Moral of the story: Always be well informed in your job, or you might miss a great opportunity. Corporate Lesson 2 A sales rep, an administration clerk and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one." "Me first! Me first!" says the admin clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." Poof! She's gone. In astonishment, "Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an Endless supply of pina coladas and the love of my life." Poof! He's gone. "OK, you're up," the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch." Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say. Corporate Lesson 3 A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A small rabbit saw the crow, and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?" The crow answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested. All of a sudden a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up. Corporate Lesson 4 A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree. Moral of the story: bul***** might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there. Corporate Lesson 5 A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground in a large field. While it was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on it. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, it began to realize how warm it was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. Moral of the story: 1) Not everyone who s***s on you is your enemy. 2) Not everyone who gets you out of s*** is your friend. 3) And when you're in deep s***, it's best to keep your mouth shut! have a lovely day!

I second to that. get well soon!

he he he. 20 Miles??? that's kinda too far away, in case of real emergencies! But it sound's good. ding ding on your mailbox!

or you could use RAPPPOE, i.e. if you want it to be really unattended. BTW, what kind of DSL router/modem do you have? most of them can be set to connect automagically. I have a siemens CS2..something. lol Anyways, google up RASPPPOE and download it. Read the readme files included, they are very well elaborated.

I've tried that, but everytime I re-install after a format of the C:\ drive (which is almost once a week due to testing unattended multiboot installs! ), I always have to re-issue the permissions. So, could you give me a short guide on using this tool.......wait! I'll read the help file and see if they've got some fourms.