Jackpot Posted August 21, 2002 Share Posted August 21, 2002 Blonde's Last Laugh A blonde had just gotten a new sports car and was out for a drive when she accidentally cut off a truck driver. He motioned for her to pull over. When she did, he got out of his truck and pulled a piece of chalk from his pocket. He drew a circle on the side of the road and gruffly commanded to the blonde, "Stand in that circle and DON'T MOVE!" He then went to her car and cut up her leather seats. When he turned around she had a slight grin on her face, so he said, "Oh you think that's funny? Watch this!" He gets a baseball bat out of his truck and breaks every window in her car. When he turns and looks at her she has a smile on her face. He is getting really mad. He gets his knife back out and slices all her tires. Now she's laughing. The truck driver is really starting to lose it. He goes back to his truck and gets a can of gas, pours it on her car and sets it on fire. He turns around and she is laughing so hard she is about to fall down. "What's so funny?" the truck driver asked the blonde. She replied, "Every time you weren't looking, I stepped outside the circle." A Blonde's Tragedy One day, a blonde's neighbor goes over to her house, sees the blonde crying, and asks her what happened. The blonde said that her mother had passed away. The neighbor made her some coffee and calmed her down a little and then left. The next day the neighbor went back over to the house and found the blonde crying again. She asked her why she was crying this time. ''I just got off of the phone with my sister, her mother died too!''Quickies 1. Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one? ( You have to hollow out the head.) 2. Why won't they hire blondes as pharmacists? (They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.) 3. Hear about the blonde that got an AM RADIO? (It took her a month to realize she could play it in the afternoon.) 4. What happened to the blonde ice hockey team? (They drowned during Spring Training.) 5. Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? (To see what was on the other side.) 6. How did the blonde die drinking milk? (The cow stepped on her.) 7. How did the blonde burn her nose? (Bobbing for French fries.) 8. Why do blondes have more fun? (They're easier to amuse.) 9. What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? (Frosted flakes.) 10. Why can't blondes put in light bulbs? (They keep breaking them with their hammers.) 11. Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the air? (She missed.) 12. What is it when a blonde blows into another blonde's ear? (Data transfer.) 13. Why did the blonde resolve to have only three children? (Because she read that one child out of every four born was Chinese.) 14. Why did the blonde put make-up on her forehead? (She wanted everyone to know that she was able to make up her mind.) 15. Why did the blonde ask her friends to save burned-out light bulbs? (She needed them for the darkroom she was building.) 16. Why are Asians so smart? (No blondes.) 17. What is the biggest advantage to marrying a blonde? (You get to park in the Handicapped Zone) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flash Posted August 21, 2002 Share Posted August 21, 2002 Lmao, Rofl... Those are well funny!! Nice selection there Jackpot!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prathapml Posted August 15, 2004 Share Posted August 15, 2004 That's Good humour, god knows what we would do for jokes if they didn't exist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ropera Posted August 15, 2004 Share Posted August 15, 2004 Why does the blonde change her baby's diapers once a week?Because on the package it says 'Up to 20 lb"=====Why did the blonde was fired from the M & M's Quality Control packaging line?Because she was throwing away all the W's Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nolookingca Posted August 16, 2004 Share Posted August 16, 2004 Some of the quickies were a bit old fashioned, but I truly did come close to "laughing my head off"16. Why are Asians so smart?(No blondes.)True Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MadGutts Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 :lollol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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