The MSFN café - A Penny for Your Thoughts

[XPerceniol]

On 5/27/2022 at 5:47 PM, XPerceniol said:

...Hate to say it - being glued to forums are that last thing I need. I need to walk alone outside the house (we're actually never alone - depends on how you view "alone") listen to the birds and the trees and flowers and not trapped in the house

 

I wrote that, no quote, know what that was/is? That is when you have the ability to (going to avoid the word) I'll say separate the subconscious from our emotional self from the and (truly) look at the man in the mirror, that person looking back is asking for advice, yet, so hard sometimes to take ones own advice. Guilty as charged! I've said it more times than I can count or even locate here. On other forums (don't even waste your time, only 2, no others) and I've broken ties and being away from forums is better for me (just speaking for myself here, of course, not saying people should not post), but when there is something missing, very hard to fill the void with more of the same and expect a different result. 

I've followed George so much and he is so near and dear to my heart and if you only knew, but I cant say further on that. Yeah, but took me time to "process" peoples posting hours after seeing them (takes me a long time sometimes to correctly process as the "knee jerk' reaction isn't always correct) I actually like that you posted what you did, because I know why you did it, you read what I wrote and what I deleted and felt that was a flip flop - and it sort of was - you see, what I wrote last night was genuine, while the reverse backwards was (while well meaning) disingenuous, and you're 100% correct, when reality hits your and revels itself, the very last thing you want to hear if life is just great with cherries on top. Truth is, George was correct as his experiences, while what some people would call negative, were what made him so great at what he did, and what made Robin so great; but in the end, if we aren't able to allow the smallest bright spots and see appreciate the blue sky, the blue ocean, the green treas and red roses, what is left blank darkness, and lets face, it, when all hope is lost it starts to make sense and logical that we must end the suffering and that is where (hopefully) we can pick ourselves up in time before we made that final decision.

On that note: High time to take my own advice - start with removing the obvious things senabling me to continue as is, or continue following down a road that leads to only that 1 option which is not a solution, rather a hopeless act of desperation to remove ourselves from the picture. Really something to be said "today is the first day of the rest or you life", so do I want tomorrow to be today ... NOPE! we deserve a chance, all I'll say as this is my FINAL off topic posting here or anywhere in the planet or galaxy as I exit the café for good. All is well and today was overall not too bad considering, but must recover or else that only one that will pay the price is self; period!

Please understand I'm going to disable my private messaging system and only allow from moderators or admin and I will no longer follow this thread and avoid it going forward wishing everyone the best.

Sorry about he mistakes, but I can't correct it any further and better to leave it as is - genuine - nothing more, nothing less, just me.

Edited May 31, 2022 by XPerceniol

[Doremi]

8 hours ago, D.Draker said:

Looks like this Compa needs to purchase some good VPN service.

Isn't the country flag something I'm supposed to set in my profile, rather than something that's auto-determined by an ip2c lookup? (Might be wrong.) Either way, you figured it out, it was kind of meant to be obvious I guess if you knew how I wrote decently enough, since it seems I have an extremely distinct way of typing and whatnot. It's no wonder I make virtually zero effort to hide; a VPN also would be pointless as well as that doesn't exactly solve the issue of 'I write in a certain way', pretty sure privacy isn't entirely conflated with anonymity even if the two overlap (this actually makes for an interesting point really though, a lot of 'normal' people really do think this!) ^_^

Just thought I'd pop by and explain why Eclipse is dead, that's all. I took it down by reporting it to the provider (simply explaining that the owner willingly refuses to comply with GDPR despite his server being hosted in a country with laws similar to it) because K4sum1 is too stubborn to figure out for himself that most of the community that actually posted content that was worth reading on Eclipse, moved over to EclecBoard after that split (that I mostly caused; to be completely honest though, I advocated for my own ban over there even if I propelled some stuff further than it needed to be.

K4sum1 refused to ban me - seemingly being too obtuse to note how it would affect the board's future, hence why everything went to crap over there: I was willing to sacrifice myself for the future of the board, and one person got in the way who eventually banned me anyway in what seemed like a final 'f-you' move to the old userbase + afterward, he refused to purge people's posts from aforementioned board who explicitly requested as such which also kinda got to me quite a bit. I just felt bad for those few people who were still there / weren't aware much of the previous drama that could have been served by a better place. (Turns out he was also snooping people's PMs and deleting posts criticising him in any way, as well as banning people for things in PMs. Surprise surprise.)

I've already severed ties with the rest of these circles otherwise (and pretty much anything else that overlaps with it). I don't contribute to them, I was always better away from it all. Sometimes I lurk around if I need something, but that's becoming much rarer nowadays, and I've made a personal rule to myself that I don't even try to partake in anywhere that could potentially overlap with anywhere I was previously - mostly to evade situations like the Eclipse one happening once again as well as more minor ones that happened afterward (mostly just me being weird on Discord, but nothing much more than that)

I'd better be off either way, since I'm not only not supposed to be here, but it's for the best that nothing escalates any further. Besides, I hardly expect anyone to start interrogating me when I apparently never provide good enough answers unless it suits exactly the point of view I created whenever I was crashing down from an elevated mental state (it's either when I'm overly elevated to the point of totally lacking any giving-a-damn or when I'm so low I get desperate for something and it just spirals on worse and worse that bad stuff happens, though once again, I don't expect a single person to sympathise after everything I did, I just expect to be spat at, laughed at and told to bugger off lmao)

Edited May 31, 2022 by Doremi

[D.Draker]

14 hours ago, Doremi said:

Isn't the country flag something I'm supposed to set in my profile, rather than something that's auto-determined by an ip2c lookup? (Might be wrong.) Either way, you figured it out, it was kind of meant to be obvious I guess if you knew how I wrote decently enough, since it seems I have an extremely distinct way of typing and whatnot. It's no wonder I make virtually zero effort to hide; a VPN also would be pointless as well as that doesn't exactly solve the issue of 'I write in a certain way', pretty sure privacy isn't entirely conflated with anonymity even if the two overlap (this actually makes for an interesting point really though, a lot of 'normal' people really do think this!) ^_^

Just thought I'd pop by and explain why Eclipse is dead, that's all. I took it down by reporting it to the provider (simply explaining that the owner willingly refuses to comply with GDPR despite his server being hosted in a country with laws similar to it) because K4sum1 is too stubborn to figure out for himself that most of the community that actually posted content that was worth reading on Eclipse, moved over to EclecBoard after that split (that I mostly caused; to be completely honest though, I advocated for my own ban over there even if I propelled some stuff further than it needed to be.

K4sum1 refused to ban me - seemingly being too obtuse to note how it would affect the board's future, hence why everything went to crap over there: I was willing to sacrifice myself for the future of the board, and one person got in the way who eventually banned me anyway in what seemed like a final 'f-you' move to the old userbase + afterward, he refused to purge people's posts from aforementioned board who explicitly requested as such which also kinda got to me quite a bit. I just felt bad for those few people who were still there / weren't aware much of the previous drama that could have been served by a better place. (Turns out he was also snooping people's PMs and deleting posts criticising him in any way, as well as banning people for things in PMs. Surprise surprise.)

I've already severed ties with the rest of these circles otherwise (and pretty much anything else that overlaps with it). I don't contribute to them, I was always better away from it all. Sometimes I lurk around if I need something, but that's becoming much rarer nowadays, and I've made a personal rule to myself that I don't even try to partake in anywhere that could potentially overlap with anywhere I was previously - mostly to evade situations like the Eclipse one happening once again as well as more minor ones that happened afterward (mostly just me being weird on Discord, but nothing much more than that)

I'd better be off either way, since I'm not only not supposed to be here, but it's for the best that nothing escalates any further. Besides, I hardly expect anyone to start interrogating me when I apparently never provide good enough answers unless it suits exactly the point of view I created whenever I was crashing down from an elevated mental state (it's either when I'm overly elevated to the point of totally lacking any giving-a-damn or when I'm so low I get desperate for something and it just spirals on worse and worse that bad stuff happens, though once again, I don't expect a single person to sympathise after everything I did, I just expect to be spat at, laughed at and told to bugger off lmao)

1 - Again you confirmed you're a new Compa's re-reg. For those who don't know , this user was banned many times . Not sure that changing the flag will help you to hide.

 

2 - Your typing/comunicating style reminds of 2009-10 UK's dating boom. This was when all nurdy females with their blackberries decided they could conquer the dating scene all of a sudden, lol.  10000000 inbox messages with "give me your pin". So in short , you write like a casual british nurdy female and there's nothing "special" about it. 

You aren't a celebrity , sorry to disappoint . I don't know if you're a female though.

Are you ? 

3- Why bother ? We could only give zero tucks about this "Clipse" . On the other hand , I see you're a sucker for attention which could explain this , obviously.

4 - I don't actually have anything against you ! But your extremely hostile behaviour towards me and some others members was always a mystery.

But then again , I could only give zero tucks about this. On the other hand , if you're a young/nice looking female .... this could change things .

 

[D.Draker]

20 hours ago, Doremi said:

I don't expect a single person to sympathise after everything I did, I just expect to be spat at, laughed at and told to bugger off lmao)

I don't know "what you did" and I'm not a jugde or copper. I have no beef with you (and never had!). I don't even know who you are (and don't care!) .

I see you have nowhere else to go . I hope of all evils lurking around in the world you aren't the worst , so I maybe could vouch for you . 

But you gotta promise us to behave .

That means no offensive behaviour , no insults , no promoting of communism/KGB/russia/etc. 

Do you still have some friends here ? I mean, so they could join me and ask the supervisors to change their mind and not ban you again ?

[Doremi]

5 hours ago, D.Draker said:

1 - Again you confirmed you're a new Compa's re-reg. For those who don't know , this user was banned many times . Not sure that changing the flag will help you to hide.

I mean, I don't see any reason to lie about my identity if I'm asked on the spot about it or questioned about it. What's the point

5 hours ago, D.Draker said:

I don't know if you're a female though.

Are you ? 

Nope. Sorry to disappoint. Interesting analysis of my writing style though, and it's not the first time I've been mistaken for a woman either... I can't say I feel insulted in any way, though. Rather, I'll take it as a compliment; that said, yeah, I guess really deep down I'm not one to invest in anything, I'm just a 'normie' or whatever, though I'm also too weird for the average normie who spends their time on TikTok (one type) or Reddit (the other type) so idk...

5 hours ago, D.Draker said:

3- Why bother ? We could only give zero tucks about this "Clipse" . On the other hand , I see you're a sucker for attention which could explain this , obviously.

Someone mentioned it. So did another user earlier on. I just felt like clarifying where the activity from that board actually went (win32's board), as I don't think it was really mentioned here.

4 - I don't actually have anything against you ! But your extremely hostile behaviour towards me and some others members was always a mystery.

I don't even know what I want: Sometimes I act hostile towards others, even when they did nothing towards me... either I want a reaction (the 'attention-seeking' thing comes back into play here, as you said) and sometimes it's because they did something I didn't like at the time to someone I like and I feel a need to do something about it.

5 hours ago, D.Draker said:

But then again , I could only give zero tucks about this. On the other hand , if you're a young/nice looking female .... this could change things .

Don't blame you at all.

To say the least, Eclipse itself came from me noticing quite a few people being annoyed with the MSFN redesign not working in older browsers (one of the main goals really was to have it accessible on virtually anything, which has carried over to EclecBoard and I'm really thankful to the mods there for expanding on that) and me trying to capitalise on that annoyance and certain things sometimes being broken for ages like the registration form and stuff at the time if I remember right. I guess I used a bunch of hyperbole and whatnot to encourage people to support the idea of a fragmented board and then it happened. It just didn't really go to plan because of two specific people (me and K4sum1, mostly me, but also K4sum1's lack of interest in the community around it and his nonexistent contribution to moderation which led to a lot of arguing about how the board should be ran).

Unfortunately, I'm a dude and suffer from hypersexuality issues among well a bunch of other crap that just makes me some kind of stereotypical NEET manbaby. (Then again, I don't use Twitter or talk about whoever's been cancelled in internet world this week for doing whatever stupid thing. If it doesn't affect me or someone I actually talk to I generally don't tend to care.)

[Doremi]

3 minutes ago, D.Draker said:

I don't know "what you did" and I'm not a jugde or copper. I have no beef with you (and never had!). I don't even know who you are (and don't care!) .

I see you have nowhere else to go . I hope of all evils lurking around in the world you aren't the worst , so I maybe could vouch for you . 

But you gotta promise us to behave .

That means no offensive behaviour , no insults , no promoting of communism/KGB/russia/etc. 

Do you still have some friends here ? I mean, so they could join me and ask the supervisors to change their mind and not ban you again ?

Oh, got ninja'd.

I mean, I have little to contribute anyways. Only really the odd question or two. Partaking in community discussion/matters is something I shouldn't really do at this stage considering everything overall.

Hey, I'm no communist. That ideology destroyed the Eastern Bloc and several other countries and turned them into censorship, monetary-deprived hell. Still interests me how so many people who unironically supporting communism/far-left socialism on social media are LGBT+ and yet communism has repeatedly repressed their people, every single time. The whole thing is a utopian philosophy, and Marx was a terrible person. (The only communist leader that was actually admirable was the Yugoslavian one really, but he's really just an exception of many other warped, disturbed people)

I don't think I do want to truly return, solely for the fact that I don't want to compromising the feelings of other people who do contribute to this forum with really good projects and stuff, that really people should be extremely grateful towards here, by existing here (and I feel this about anywhere else that I was banned at and people knew things I did back in 2016-2019). I don't want to cause another split again somehow or tension within the community, it's really not fair, and I feel like if I stayed around, which is incredibly unlikely due to my past history overall, it would simply drive away a lot of the extended kernel and XP people from ever posting here again because of my history with them. That's really not something I'd like to be the reason for again after everything, not here, not anywhere.

[D.Draker]

3 hours ago, Doremi said:

Oh, got ninja'd.

I mean, I have little to contribute anyways. Only really the odd question or two. Partaking in community discussion/matters is something I shouldn't really do at this stage considering everything overall.

Hey, I'm no communist. That ideology destroyed the Eastern Bloc and several other countries and turned them into censorship, monetary-deprived hell. Still interests me how so many people who unironically supporting communism/far-left socialism on social media are LGBT+ and yet communism has repeatedly repressed their people, every single time. The whole thing is a utopian philosophy, and Marx was a terrible person. (The only communist leader that was actually admirable was the Yugoslavian one really, but he's really just an exception of many other warped, disturbed people)

I don't think I do want to truly return, solely for the fact that I don't want to compromising the feelings of other people who do contribute to this forum with really good projects and stuff, that really people should be extremely grateful towards here, by existing here (and I feel this about anywhere else that I was banned at and people knew things I did back in 2016-2019). I don't want to cause another split again somehow or tension within the community, it's really not fair, and I feel like if I stayed around, which is incredibly unlikely due to my past history overall, it would simply drive away a lot of the extended kernel and XP people from ever posting here again because of my history with them. That's really not something I'd like to be the reason for again after everything, not here, not anywhere.

Not a commie ? What did I say , there's still hope you're a good person inside. What do you mean oversexulaity ? You mean h0rny ? Is it supposed to be bad as of now ?!

I'm from another generation , lol. 

Just don't bring your "oversexuality" here ! This is a techno forum and everything will be okay ! 

[D.Draker]

3 hours ago, Doremi said:

I mean, I have little to contribute anyways.

Well you could help me to improve my British cursing , for example.

[UCyborg]

19 hours ago, XPerceniol said:

I actually like that you posted what you did, because I know why you did it, you read what I wrote and what I deleted and felt that was a flip flop - and it sort of was - you see, what I wrote last night was genuine, while the reverse backwards was (while well meaning) disingenuous, and you're 100% correct, when reality hits your and revels itself, the very last thing you want to hear if life is just great with cherries on top.

Yes, I relate to what you wrote before you edited it. Didn't really mean to criticize you for editing (just in case there was even a subtle hint of that), I know full well that dwelling on negativity isn't good neither. Can't say I've figured out exactly how to balance it.

My mind is kinda in the darker place now, though not as dark as sometimes in the past. I used to lose myself in virtual worlds, you know, escapism. That worked for a while to keep the mind from wandering off.

Take all the time off you need and all the best to you as well.

Can't say about other forums since this is the only one where I'm active ATM, but I think the vibe here was better years ago. Perhaps due to different people. Came for two projects, one abandoned, not much to say about the other, it just works, but otherwise, honestly not sure what I'm still doing here since I don't really fit in here. Nostalgia?

Funny thing I forgot to mention few days ago...I only recently realized your name here is XPerceniol, not XPerenciol. My mind always "auto-corrected" that.

And about that guy who thought he could function with one liver...can't say the story surprised me, all things considered. One could read about weird things happening all the time...the absurdity. iPhone, iPad, iPwn, iSmack...iBedridden. Got reminded of news of youngsters who manage to blow parts of their limbs off with pyrotechnics in new year's time, all of that misery as the result of that pointless banging. The news is made, gruesome pictures are shown and the world keeps on spinning. Then the story repeats the next year.

Since this is Funny Farm...

[mina7601]

2 hours ago, UCyborg said:

Funny thing I forgot to mention few days ago...I only recently realized your name here is XPerceniol, not XPerenciol. My mind always "auto-corrected" that.

Same here, pal. I realized that when I first posted on this forum. I used to mispronounce his name a lot, until I learned to pronounce it correctly, lol.

2 hours ago, UCyborg said:

Since this is Funny Farm...

I just watched this hours ago, that video is damn hilarious. 

@XPerceniol I hope things are going well with you, friend. All the best.

[UCyborg]

Saw a title of an article in some magazine that read along the lines "Who will feed American babies?".

Did they ever think about NOT creating them in the first place? No, of course not! People just have to keep creating more problems.

[AstroSkipper]

Hi @XPerceniol, I wish you sincerely the very best and that the future will take a positive turn for you.

Kind regards, AstroSkipper 

[D.Draker]

@XPerceniol, you're in our hearts forever !

[UCyborg]

On 5/31/2022 at 11:28 PM, UCyborg said:

honestly not sure what I'm still doing here since I don't really fit in here.

Maybe I'm just bluffing. I'm unusually talkative here and this is still one of the cooler / calmer places on the internet.

[D.Draker]

On 6/6/2022 at 8:24 PM, UCyborg said:

Maybe I'm just bluffing. I'm unusually talkative here and this is still one of the cooler / calmer places on the internet.

What can I do to entertain you ? Some funny horror stories from my childhood maybe ?